Are you my "Fluffer?"

I'm feeling a need to comment on last week's episode of New Girl.

As I closed the door behind my friend who had gone with me to Olive Garden for the never-ending pasta bowl in honor of the Glee characters' favorite restaurant "Breadsticks," I wondered...

"Are you my Fluffer?"

As any girl from the San Fernando Valley aka Capital of Porn would know, a fluffer keeps the man aroused while he waits for the camera to start rolling. In this particular episode, the boys accuse Nick of being Jess' Emotional Fluffer. She is trying to just have casual sex with her man, while calling on Nick for the boyfriend-y type things like assembling her dresser.

I guess I can kind of relate to this situation. I haven't had a "boyfriend" in a very long time. My last relationship was long distance, so he wasn't exactly there to take me to dinner, tell me what's wrong with my car, or hang things on my wall. I've always counted on my two best guy friends for those kind of things...I frequently bring them as my "plus one" to various work and family events.

I've never really thought that might be unfair to my friend, so oopsies. All the work of being a boyfriend, none of the benefits.

So, Pinata: Thanks for always fixing my car and checking my oil/tires, for taking me to dinner, and for attending any and all events I ask you to! 

P.S. I know you've thought about having sex with me.