The EX Games

I got wrapped up in my "I think I'm getting close to having a boyfriend" thoughts. This led to an event I am really not proud of, but I'm going to own up to it. And if The Busy Builder reads this, it will be the first he's heard of it...

Or rather, the Ex Games...

Against my better judgement, I was still in contact with The Aussie. He surprised me with a trip he planned to Los Angeles since he had an Aussie football tournament in San Diego. When he told me he would stay in a hostel and find his way around, my soft spot for him suggested he stay in the guest room at my house (with no funny business). I instantly regretted my offer, but it was already out there, and he accepted. Subsequently, he went on a mission to make the trip about winning me back:

• He bought me tickets to see the X games on Friday and Saturday 
• He bought us tickets to the Dodger game on Sunday

I made it very clear that I had to work while he was in town, and that I'd try to come to what I could. 

As the weekend grew close, I nearly bit all my nails off with anxiety. I REALLY didn't think it was a good idea for us to see each other. I didn't want to hurt him. And selfishly, I would have much rather spent the weekend with The Busy Builder.

Two days before The Aussie arrived, I told him I no longer felt comfortable with him staying at my house. Ugh, I'm an asshole. Frankly, I didn't trust him alone in my house. Last time he logged into my Facebook and read all my private messages. He has a history of snooping through my personal items. My friendship with my ex-boyfriends caused a lot of drama in our relationship, and I wasn't about to continue the cycle with my new relationship. He was really upset, but said he hoped we could still hang out...I said yes to lunch on Saturday and Dodgers on Sunday. 

Friday night instead of going to the X games, I went out and met The Busy Builder's friends. He spent the night and I had no problem sleeping with him while knowing The Aussie was sitting alone in his hostel. I'm an asshole. The next morning my phone buzzed with a text from The Aussie confirming lunch, and I ignored it to get waffles with The Busy Builder. We spent the afternoon in my backyard drinking margaritas and playing silly 20 question games about each other. I was having the best day with him, but my phone kept interrupting with The Aussie's calls and texts. I'm an asshole. After The Busy Builder left my house to get some work done, I finally texted The Aussie back that I was sorry for not answering. I'm sure he knew why. He yelled at me and told me I am the biggest bitch he's ever met and he couldn't believe he flew out there to see me (even though I never asked him to). I felt awful, but also relieved. I guess I needed him to hate me. So he could move on for good.

I never even told The Busy Builder that The Aussie was in LA. If you asked him, he'd say that day we laid in my backyard and got sunburned was one of his favorite dates with me. 

I'm an asshole.

...and I'm sure this will come back to bite me.